Every August, the same feeling shows up in households across South Carolina. It is that mix of “finally!” and “wait, already?” Recently, the S.C. Parent Advisory Council members, supported by Children’s Trust of South Carolina, tackled back-to-school, where they had an honest, funny and practical conversation about dealing with everything from twin toddlers starting their very first classroom to teenagers touring colleges.
It’s Fine to Feel All the Feelings at Once
Nobody in the group felt the same way about the new school year, and that’s exactly the point. One mom described feeling excited for her first-grader, nervous for her daughter starting middle school and a little sad about her high schooler’s shrinking time at home before college, all at once. Another parent, ready to return to a regular schedule after a summer of third-shift work, was simply counting down the days.
Our takeaway: There’s no “correct” way to feel about back-to-school. Relief, anxiety, excitement and grief over how fast your kids are growing up can all show up in the same week, sometimes even before you exit the school drop-off line.
Routines Don’t Rebuild Themselves Overnight
The group agreed on one thing: Shifting from summer’s looser schedule to the school-year grind takes intention. Parents talked about easing bedtimes back earlier, a little at a time, rather than flipping a switch overnight, building in after-school pickup plans before sports and activities ramp up and using the last week before school starts to “practice” the morning rhythm.
For parents whose kids are heading into a new setting for the first time, like toddlers starting a Montessori program, the advice was to lean on orientation and open house events to learn the actual pickup and drop-off flow, then adjust naps and routines gradually to match.
A Strong Defense Against All Those New Germs
After a summer away from classrooms, kids are suddenly back in close contact with shared crayons, water fountains and each other’s germs. Parents swapped useful tips: keeping hand sanitizer in the car and clipped to backpacks, skipping water fountains altogether and staying alert for early signs of illness so a cough doesn’t turn into a week at home from school.
Helping Kids (and Parents) Handle the Nerves
Back-to-school jitters aren’t just for kids. The group shared a range of strategies for easing into the school year with more energy and less anxiety:
- Make the morning fun. One parent lets her kids take turns choosing music for the drive to school, turning the commute into something to look forward to rather than a rushed scramble.
- Let kids own their gear. Picking out a backpack, lunchbox or supplies featuring a favorite character can help younger kids feel more excited about starting something new.
- Create affirmations together. One mom shared that her son made up his own song about being strong and smart, which he now sings on the way to school. What a great reminder that when kids create their own coping tools, they tend to stick with them.
- Visit before the first day, if possible. Open houses and school visits ahead of time help kids build familiarity with a new space before they’re expected to spend a whole day there.
Protecting Family Time Once the Busy Season Hits
Summer gives families room to breathe, but once school, sports and activities resume, that breathing room can disappear quickly. The group’s advice was to intentionally protect small pockets of connection: a weekly show watched together, a standing family dinner night or a Sunday reset day for laundry and prep before the week begins.
One parent described a weekly TV show tradition with her teenager that’s become so sacred neither of them will answer the phone during it. Another shared a “Pizza Friday” tradition with paper plates and a movie. With no decisions about dinner, they love this low-stress way to end a busy week. The consistency matters because kids notice when something is protected as “their” time.
Making Room for Big Feelings
Kids of all ages can all bring home big feelings, like rejection, being left out, a bad grade or just a rough day. As parents, we don’t have to solve it in the moment. We can simply make sure our kids know there’s a person and a place where whatever they share will be met with listening instead of judgment.
Small daily habits can help you be their safe harbor: Asking about the best and hardest parts of the day, noticing when a child wants quiet rather than conversation on the ride home and making sure they come home to a calm, welcoming presence even after a hard day.
The Expensive Side of Back-to-School
The group didn’t shy away from the real cost of a new school year and the pressure that comes with it. Their advice for easing that burden:
- Shop out of season. Buying school supplies and clothing during clearance sales, rather than in the back-to-school rush, can save money.
- Buy in bulk for consumables. Pencils, folders, and other basics that get used up fast are often cheaper — and more convenient — bought in bulk once rather than repeatedly through the year.
- Lean on your community. Churches and community organizations across the state often run back-to-school drives. Co-parents, extended family and others in your village can help with the list, so the cost and effort don’t fall on one person alone.
- Let go of the guilt. If you can’t get everything on the list, that’s okay. A well-rested, well-fed kid who shows up on time is what matters most — not whether their backpack is brand-name.
The Advice They’d Give Any Parent
When asked to sum up their best piece of advice for the season, a few themes rose to the top:
- Give yourself grace. You’ve already given your child the fundamentals. The rest, like fancy new shoes or name-brand pencils, matters far less than what you’ve already instilled in them.
- Don’t sweat the small stuff. Whatever lowers your stress level — buying ahead, planning ahead, simplifying where you can — is worth doing.
- Hold on to your connection points. In the busy rush of a new school year, small consistent moments, like a weekly tradition, a family dinner or being the DJ on the drive to school, will matter more than any item on a checklist.
- Get creative when money is tight. Thrifted clothes, hand-me-downs and out-of-the-box choices don’t have to be something to hide. They can become part of what makes your kids uniquely themselves.
The Bigger Picture
What came through most clearly was the reminder that back-to-school is as much an emotional transition as a logistical one for parents and kids alike. Routines, traditions and community support all play a role in making the season feel more manageable and a little more joyful.
Wherever your family is in this season, dropping off a toddler for the very first time, or sending a teenager off with a car full of dorm supplies down the road, you’re not doing it alone.
If you’re finding this time challenging, take a moment to read this article, also written by the PAC: “When We’re Not the Parents We Aspire to Be.”
