As a researcher, I spend a lot of time with data tables, transcripts and surveys. As a parent, I spend a lot of time packing lunches, answering big feelings with tired hugs, and hoping I am doing enough.
This latest research project brought those two worlds together in a powerful way.
Through a statewide study with South Carolina parents and child care providers, we set out to understand something simple but essential: how communication between parents and child care providers shapes trust, engagement and children’s development in South Carolina.
The findings affirmed what many of us feel in our bones: connection matters. They also gave us practical direction for what to do next.
Here are five takeaways that get to the heart of why this research matters, not just for policy or programs, but for families like mine and yours.
1. Communication Is the Foundation of Trust.
When we asked parents what helps them trust their child’s provider, one answer rose above the rest: communication. Open, respectful, reliable back-and-forth was not just appreciated. It was the top driver of positive relationships between families and providers.
Parents and providers alike said that communication is essential for staying aligned on children’s growth and development.
As a parent, this rang true. Trusting someone else with your child is one of the biggest leaps of faith there is. A short conversation at drop-off, a thoughtful question about how your child slept, or a message saying “today was a great day” carries weight. It says, I see your child, and I see you.
As a researcher, it was striking to see that this feeling is measurable. Daily communication is not just pleasant. It is linked with higher engagement and greater comfort approaching providers with concerns. Trust grows from these everyday moments.
2. Parents are Engaged Partners.
There is a misperception that parents “drop off and disappear.” Our research shows the opposite. Seventy-six percent of surveyed parents reported being very or extremely engaged in their child’s child care experience.
Parents want meaningful updates about learning, development and well-being. They are eager to partner with providers on cognitive, social-emotional, behavioral and language development.
Even around tough topics, parents are leaning in. Seventy-nine percent said they feel very confident discussing difficult issues with their child’s provider.
As a parent, I know what it is like to rehearse a hard conversation on the drive to pick-up, about biting, developmental milestones, or worries you cannot quite name yet. It matters to know that providers are ready to partner, not judge. As a researcher, I see a powerful opportunity here. Families are ready and willing to engage. Systems and supports should meet them there.
3. Daily Communication Strengthens Children’s Development and Parental Confidence.
The takeaway I keep returning to is this: when families and providers connect through consistent, positive communication, children thrive. Strong communication supports healthy development and strengthens families, and communities benefit from a more stable workforce.
Daily conversations lead to higher parental engagement and greater confidence in discussing difficult situations.
Anyone who has ever agonized over whether to bring something up with a teacher knows how meaningful that confidence is. Communication does not just transfer information. It reassures parents and improves the child care experience for children.
As both a parent and a researcher, this confirms what I feel at pickup time. Those two minutes at the classroom door matter.
4. Providers Want Support, and Real Barriers Get in the Way.
Our research also highlighted something important. Communication is not hard because people do not care. It is hard because people are stretched.
Providers named time and resource constraints and juggling multiple communication channels as real challenges. Parents mentioned scheduling conflicts, lack of private space for sensitive conversations, and frustrations with technology as barriers. None of these are about attitudes. They are about logistics.
At the same time, providers are asking for professional development to grow their communication confidence. They want support to explain emotional and developmental needs (49%), talk with parents about child development (44%), and communicate developmental milestones (40%).
As a parent, it means a lot to know my child’s provider also wants tools and time to have better conversations with me. As a researcher, it tells me that investing in professional development and realistic schedules is not optional. It is key to stronger partnerships.
5. We Need Both Efficient Digital Tools and Human, Face-to-Face Connection.
Another clear theme was balance. Both parents and providers use digital tools such as texts, apps and emails and find them helpful. But they also reported feeling overwhelmed by the number of platforms and still named in-person conversations as the most valued form of communication.
Parents told us they appreciate photos, behavioral notes and developmental updates through digital tools, but want real conversation when something truly matters.
As a parent who has both joyfully scrolled through classroom pictures and stood in a hallway trying to find the right words, I recognize this tension. Technology can support communication, but it cannot replace the vulnerability and collaboration of a face-to-face conversation.
Where this Leaves Us
Across surveys and focus groups, one message came through clearly. Families and providers want the same thing: trusting partnerships that put children first. That shared goal is our biggest strength.
As a researcher, I see pathways for action such as professional development for providers, realistic time for relationship-building, fewer but better digital tools, and intentional spaces for private conversations. As a parent, I see something simpler: say hello, ask questions, share concerns early, and remember that we are in this together.
Communication will not magically make parenting easy. But it does make it shared, and that makes all the difference.
