Members of the S. C. Parent Advisory Council, organized by Children’s Trust of South Carolina, meet regularly and share their collective wisdom on a wide range of parenting topics. We always leave those conversations with a full heart and so much gratitude, which is especially true as we navigate through the holiday season. Our most recent conversation focused on the holidays and how we create and adapt traditions that suit our constantly evolving families.
Here are the highlights. Feel free to adopt any ideas.
Focus on Traditions That Bring Joy and a Big Dose of Laughter
For some, the holiday season kicks off with the crisp air of fall. Shelina shared how her family goes apple picking every year, coming home to make “a whole bunch of apple stuff.”
Others have found that the silliest moments often become the most cherished: karaoke, goofy pajama mornings or chasing kids around the house in festive sweaters.
Emily shared that her favorite holiday tradition is just for her and her husband. “We take a day off together during the holidays – no kids, just us. We shop, watch a movie and have dinner. It’s a chance to reconnect in a season that gives so much to the kids.” Meanwhile, her children keep their own tradition alive with a baking day featuring their famous crockpot candy.
Embrace Change
Families change, and so do traditions. After Leesa’s grandmother passed away, her family shifted their big holiday meal into a cozy brunch. Everyone in pajamas, eating and talking around the table. “Be present,” she says. “It’s the greatest gift.”
For Ruth-Naomi, the focus is on keeping the feeling of home alive, even when the faces or places change. After losing her father this year, she reflected, “Holidays change, but the feeling of home should never change. As long as there’s laughter, it’s a success.” Her family’s signature dishes (collard greens, banana pudding and macaroni and cheese) bring continuity through the years.
Camille’s family travels, sometimes to the beach and sometimes to Disney, which eases the pressure on those who usually host the big family dinner. They are also starting to look at the next generation to help with the prep and planning, and they have done a great job!
Anthony shared that, “Babies change everything — as they should.” They are totally mixing up their holiday plans this year.
Inherit, Evolve and Build
Some traditions have been passed down for generations, such as Shelina’s mom being the one who knows her dad’s famous stuffing recipe. It is a dish now so beloved that she gets multiple requests for it every year. Others evolve, such as Leesa’s childhood memory of delivering Christmas gifts to families in need, which her brother now carries on with his own kids.
These stories show us that traditions don’t need to be fancy — they just have to hold meaning. Whether it’s karaoke on Christmas Eve, apple picking in October, or eating Chinese food instead of turkey, it’s the sense of connection that makes it memorable.
Ways to Create (and Keep) Meaningful Traditions
The parents agreed: The best traditions are the ones that work for your family. Here are their top takeaways:
- Let traditions evolve. “Traditions are beautiful because they can change,” one parent said. “We forget we can do whatever we want.”
- Set boundaries. Decide what works for your family, and don’t be afraid to say no to the rest. “It’s about doing what’s best for your family and having support.”
- Simplify. Whether it’s serving brunch in pajamas or focusing on one special dish, the holidays don’t have to be picture-perfect to be meaningful.
- Find stillness. After the hustle, give yourself time to rest and reflect.
- Keep the feeling of home. Whether through food, laughter or shared memories, what matters most is that everyone feels loved and welcome.
Treasuring the Calm After the Chaos
Whether they are old or new, holiday traditions are about celebrating survival, love and the bonds of connection. As Camille beautifully put it, “It really comes back to being with those we love. Celebrate each other, surviving another year, looking forward to the year to come.”
And when you finally have that moment alone on Christmas afternoon after all the work and chaos, take Camille’s recommendation. Savor the “joy in the stillness” and behold how the “quiet is so much deeper.”
We wish everyone joy and peace this holiday season.
